.

everytime i hear footsteps outside i thought he came to look for me to say everything's okay

but i think it's just stupid because i never gotten surprises like that and will never.




and i was sorry for being grumpy even though i didn't want to go over there to eat with him but still went, hoping that sometimes he would get a hint that i'm pretty fucking annoyed that i have to travel because i already did yesterday but it really is my bad. what to do. angry for all the wrong reasons.

a s u s u a l.

then again it comes back to the bottomline, if i wanted to do anything nice out of my own willingness, don't complain and don't expect reciprocation. but

who's perfect?

aren't we all like that-- you gave a friend a lift out of goodwill and the person didn't give you anything in return, you helped a friend buy a drink because it was on the way and the person never ever offered, you helped your friend buy sometthing from overseas and they only said WOW thanks dude and never bought you anything in return. that's because they didn't ask you to do anything for them....so angry for what? bloodyhell, when can i get out of this circle. and i'm officially round-the-clock-grumpy-pumpkin.